Episodes 91

1 Rules

November 1, 2016

3m

The group gets mixed up over whether Jeff/Boneweevil can confirm the information Erin/Beur gave when she entered the scene. Dan inquires whether someone can enter a scene and make something up without it being established.

2 The Wrestling Match

November 1, 2016

4m

The Village Chief challenges the group to a celebratory wrestling match. Boneweevil and Teflonto tag team against the Chief. Fondue wrestles his inner demons in the main event. Jeff takes a walk in the void.

3 The Test Game

November 1, 2016

4m

Paul explains his experience with fantasy role playing. Spencer gives him a test game, where Paul finds himself in a small room, and has to find his way out.

4 The Backstories

November 1, 2016

1m

Dan is amused by Spencer's method by which he told Dan of his character's backstory. He says he'd like Spencer to deliver all his bad news. The group jokes about what examples of bad news Spencer would give.

5 Looking for Tunnels

November 1, 2016

4m

The group searches for a way to get through the cave into the mine. Deepok Chopra's feud with the Dwarf ghosts comes into play. Fondue finds out that women have the best perception, Beur and Deepok explain how they scan, Fondue gets impatient.

6 Boneweevil Has Evasion

November 1, 2016

1m

Boneweevil taunts at the Dwarf Ghosts, who in turn try to attack him with pick axes. Boneweevil has evasion, and is one-step ahead of their attack.

7 Kevin McCallister

November 1, 2016

2m

Entering the cave, Deepk Chopra explains her backstory and how she became a monk. She reveals that she was not talking to anyone else in time at the time of the attack; the "Kevin McCallister" of Dwarven Monks.

8 Boneweevil Farts on Beur

November 1, 2016

2m

Beur crawls through the tunnel, warning Boneweevil not to fart on her. Boneweevil farts into the tunnel, thinking that it's Fondue. Beur is reminded of her father. Jeff gets his Harmon universes mixed up.

9 Steve's Cardboard Box Test Game

November 1, 2016

2m

Spencer gives Steve Agee a tutorial in which he finds himself in a large cardboard box, filled with a mysteriously salty fluid. Steve finds a way to exit the box, and reveals he killed JFK.

10 Getting into The Union House

November 1, 2016

3m

Fondue distracts the guard, Knave, creating a diversion for Boneweevil to enter the Union House. Boneweevil tries to get information out of the bartender, who gives Boneweevil a hard time.

11 Orc Penis

November 1, 2016

2m

Fondue wants to draw a penis on the guard's forehead. Beur asks questions about what an Orc penis looks like. Fondue goes into great detail, in order to hit on Beur.

12 Poop and Pee Smugglers

November 1, 2016

2m

As they group asks Rib Sanchez about his backstory, Boneweevil gets a little too close. Fondue tries to figure out whether the sailors are for the crown or against the crown. Beur wonders whether they are poop and pee smugglers. Rib Sanchez is pro-environment, but also makes drugs out of the excrement.

13 Rib's Backstory and Racism

November 1, 2016

2m

Rib reveals that he grew up in a place where everything was hard, so he smuggles soft things back to his land and get rich. Fondue tries to relate, but Rib reveals he is slightly racist against Orcs. Beur is amused by Rib's racist jokes against Orcs. Fondue tries to keep calm.

14 More Orc Racism

November 1, 2016

1m

In attempting to fish, Fondue stumbles his words, causing Beur to go off on another racist joke against Orcs. Rib joins in on the fun. Fondue fails to keep his cool.

15 Toilet Talk

November 1, 2016

5m

The group finds themselves in a prison cell, where a voice reveals another prisoner; a gnome named Hawaiian Coffee. Fondue finds a toilet, but Hawaiian Coffee warns him to stay away. She explains how she got arrested and her clothing, before revealing she is magic and can transfigure anything.

16 Fondue Gets Upset

November 1, 2016

3m

The group argue over their next move. Fondue wants to hide the guards' bodies to hide the evidence, but Beur, Boneweevil and Hawaiian Coffee question his judgement. Beur punches Fondue in the face to calm him down, which does not work. Hawaiian Coffee ignores Fondue's rant. Boneweevil tries to keep the peace. Fondue moves the guards' bodies out of stubbornness.

17 Guard's Mother

November 1, 2016

2m

In attempt to cause a distraction for an escape, Hawaiian Coffee assumes the shape of one of the Guard's mother. She insists the guard needs to leave and help his brother.

18 Cheetos

November 1, 2016

1m

Jeff mistakenly eats a cheeto, John warns him not to touch his eyes for five days.

19 Renaming the Desert

November 1, 2016

1m

Fondue wants to rename the "Sandman Desert." He has a brief conversation with the Sun.

20 John's Backstory

November 1, 2016

2m

John Hodgman gives his backstory with role-playing games. Dan relates and jokes about his career being based on bullying his nerdier, younger self.

21 John's Test Game

November 1, 2016

2m

In a test game, John finds himself in a public restroom with an overflowing toilet. John goes through a "large man sized door," which is the size of a large man, in order to escape.

22 Do You Own the Trees?

November 1, 2016

1m

Fondue tries to swing through the trees. Beur chides him as a copycat, Dan wonders whether she thinks she owns the trees, singing a song as an copyright-free parody of the Pocahontas song.

23 Thomas' Test Game

November 1, 2016

3m

Spencer walks Thomas through a test scenario, where he finds himself in a hallway filled with statues. Thomas uses his tote bag to swap the weight of the golden statue, gaining access to the exit. Thomas, being an avid role-player, rolls dice to simulate whether he would have passed the test; he does not.

24 Heroes

November 1, 2016

2m

Boneweevil deduces from their tests that they are all heroes in their own way. As Dildo is about to corroborate Boneweevil's revelation, he has a brief stroke. Coming to, and brushing it off as something that happens all the time, Beur comforts him like a small baby.

25 Labyrinth

November 1, 2016

3m

Dan establishes how much Erin loves the movie Labyrinth, and can easily answer the riddle in which they are asked. Jeff and Spencer both heard the riddle from other sources. Boneweevil successfully explains how to solve the riddle. Fondue and Beur warn Boneweevil of the perils of choosing "down," as it happened in Labyrinth. Thomas and Jeff mimick the talking hands from the movie.

26 Dildo's Outfit

November 1, 2016

2m

Dildo welcomes the group to his campfire, and explains his backstory. Boneweevil questions Dildo's intentions, Dildo tries to pull Boneweevil's leg. Dildo explains his outfit to the group.

27 Once You Go Goblin

November 1, 2016

2m

Boneweevil gives Eddie a hand job, Eddie praises it as better than Fondue's. Boneweevil attempts to make a pun about Goblins, Beur masturbates and cries in the corner. Praising Bonweevil's hand job again, Eddie insults Fondue's ability and his absent father.

28 Box of Socks

November 1, 2016

1m

After finding Master Sage in a box, Boneweevil opens a series of boxes - one is full of rocks, one has another box, which is full of socks. Eddie warns Boneweevil not to touch the socks, as he's had a lot of alone time over the years.

29 Fondue's Song

November 1, 2016

1m

Fondue sings a public-domain song about looking for a key.

30 Eddie's Life Story

November 1, 2016

3m

Eddie is forced at knife-point to expand on his life story. He explains that his friends are all dead, because previous adventurers had killed them in attempt to gain entrance to the temple. Because of this, Eddie has a suicidal outlook on life, but is bound by his contract not to kill himself. Fondue explains the wonders of the outside world; parades, parties, juice, etc. Boneweevil asks Eddie if he's ever had sex before, Fondue gets the hint and asks the team to leave the room.

31 Synax!

November 1, 2016

3m

Fondue announces he wants to do something cool during his next turn. James Dean attacks one of the cultists - a thin, grey old man. The group feels bad about hurting the old man. When it's finally Fondue's turn, he proclaims: "SYNAX! NOW YOU DIE!" Erin is disappointed. Fondue tries some cool one-liners to yell at Synax before he attacks the cultist.

32 Homophonic Joke

November 1, 2016

1m

Beur says she doesn't need "your gaze," which sounded homophobic, Fondue apologizes to James Dean. Spencer explains it was a "homophonic" joke. Dan invites the audience to stay tuned for a spirited wordplay discussion.

33 The Orange Potion and The Holy Blast

November 1, 2016

3m

Beur uses her orange potion, not knowing what it does. The potion makes Vortheon fly into the air. He counter attacks by magically ripping out Beur's blood into a large spike, which hits Boneweevil. James Dean saves the day by using her much-awaited Holy Blast, to the excitement of her compatriots.

34 Jeff Davis

November 1, 2016

2m

After Beur takes some damage in a battle, Synax fires a bolt of energy at Jeff Davis, who is randomly in the room. Jeff makes some small talk with the heroes, then leaves. Fondue and Beur note the french novel Jeff was holding, and both agree he's not a poser.

35 Fondue's Parents

November 1, 2016

2m

Chadge is eager to rebuild his relationship with Fondue. He asks about Fondue's mother, Fondue tells him the grim tale of her eventually slapping herself to death because she was alone.

36 Tedder's Speech

November 1, 2016

2m

Boneweevil and Fondue inspire Tedder Spice to rally the people into defending the village. Various villagers speak up in support of the Chief and his hair. A little boy tells a sad story

37 Fondue's Flashback

November 1, 2016

2m

While building the cage around the village, Fondue hangs from the monkey bars as Chadge works. Fondue recalls a similar childhood memory in which he was swinging from monkey bars, but his father was nowhere to be seen. Chadge disappears into the void. Back in the present, Chadge gives Fondue words of support, while Fondue hopes the Manticore can't get through twigs.

38 Invoices

November 1, 2016

2m

The group tries to barter with the old Chief to pay off Chadge's debt. Chadge insists he can't allow this to happen. Fondue tries to get their priorities straight before worrying about "invoices." Fondue gets emotional and insists his father owes him. Chadge tries to make it up to him by offering him a painting.

39 Live at SXSW 2017

March 13, 2017

25m

Sorry we have no overview for this episode! Help us to improve our docs.

40 HarmonQuest Panel from NY Comic Con

November 17, 2017

25m

Hosted by Travis McElroy

41 Behind The Scenes At Starburns Castle

November 28, 2017

25m

Sorry we have no overview for this episode! Help us to improve our docs.

42 Gillian’s Pathfinder Crash Course

December 1, 2017

2m

Spencer doesn’t trust the Audio Guys and teaches Gillian how to play Pathfinder.

43 Mallory, You Do Love Fashion

December 1, 2017

1m

The gang reminisces about things that didn’t happen.

44 High in Protein

December 1, 2017

2m

Boneweevil and Charles Fight some Verches.

45 The B-Bad Boys

December 1, 2017

1m

The gang finds that their reputation precedes them.

46 Beur’s Rage Issues

December 1, 2017

2m

Beur recalls her spotted past as a rage-a-holic.

47 Rory’s Pathfinder Crash Course

December 1, 2017

2m

Spencer teaches Rory how to play Pathfinder.

48 Let’s Quest

December 1, 2017

1m

The gang tries to get to the bottom of saying let’s quest to kick off the episode.

49 Rory jumps the gun

December 1, 2017

3m

The gang tries to remember what happened last episode, and Rory tries to show up early.

50 Where’s the Cauldron?

December 1, 2017

2m

The gang finds the flower they were questing for, but realizes they left their cauldron in the swamp.

51 A Witch’s Reckoning

December 1, 2017

1m

Krandrelarius tries to get the gang to stay and hang out.

52 Boneweevil’s Absence

December 1, 2017

1m

Boneweevil and Fondue have a heart to heart about their time apart.

53 Beauflecks Sings

December 1, 2017

1m

The gang chats with Beauflecks, who sings a Draconic Shower Song.

54 The Friendship Bracelet

December 1, 2017

4m

The gang argues and a season-long completely cut runner is born.

55 Broken Bracelet

December 1, 2017

1m

Boneweevil tries to strangle a demon with the friendship bracelet, and it breaks, obviously.

56 A Strong Finish

December 1, 2017

2m

Spencer can’t come up with a cliffhanger.

57 Paul’s Pathfinder Crash Course

December 1, 2017

2m

Spencer teaches Paul how to play Pathfinder and looks so fat in that shirt jeez.

58 Bonebreak Village

December 5, 2017

1m

The gang discovers that they kinda killed all of the people in Bonebreak Village.

59 Expanded Handshake

December 1, 2017

1m

The Tooth Beast teaches the gang a new handshake.

60 Scents O’Dyne’s Secret

December 1, 2017

3m

Beur wants to know the secret to the Tooth Beast’s happiness.

61 Mortal Hands

December 1, 2017

3m

The gang knows the secret to defeating the Caretaker of the Abyss, but doesn’t understand the ramifications of that knowledge.

62 Patton’s Pathfinder Crash Course

December 1, 2017

2m

Patton already knows how to play Pathfinder but these make good extra content.

63 The Tell-Tale Tea

December 1, 2017

2m

Boneweevil is suspicious of Sandpole’s tea, made by his grandma Adam Sandler.

64 Tea Party Paranoia

December 1, 2017

2m

The gang is still suspicious of the tea and investigates Sandpole’s house.

65 Tea Party Trustfall

December 1, 2017

2m

Boneweevil makes a noble and time-consuming show of drinking the tea to demonstrate trust while a demon sword slaughters civilians.

66 Expanded Demon Fight

December 1, 2017

3m

The gang fights the sword demon. Hilarity ensues.

67 Harmonquest Post Show

December 1, 2017

1m

Dan and friends talk break down the play by play of the show that just happened.

68 Janet’s Pathfinder Crash Course

December 1, 2017

3m

Spencer teaches Janet how to play Pathfinder; Janet eats her leg.

69 Fondue’s Friendship

December 1, 2017

1m

Beur talks to Sedona about Fondue and Boneweevil’s strained friendship.

70 Expanded Manifest

December 1, 2017

1m

The gang chats with The Manifest and puts on pants.

71 Gremlin Generator

December 1, 2017

3m

Fondue creates a Gremlin.

72 Saving Sedona

December 1, 2017

1m

The gang rounds out the fight with that weird doppelgänger thing.

73 Jason’s Pathfinder Crash Course

December 1, 2017

1m

Spencer teaches Jason how to play Pathfinder but kinda peters out at the end.

74 Expanded City Guards

December 1, 2017

3m

The gang is confounded by and attempts to murder the City Guards.

75 My Name’s Gribble Grabble

December 1, 2017

3m

The gang meets Gribble Grabble, the plucky young beggar boy.

76 Not that Kind of Minor Magic

December 1, 2017

1m

Dan and friends become the first webseries to get letters.

77 Not Cool, Man

December 1, 2017

1m

Fondue tries to put a knife up Grabble Gribble’s butt.

78 Elizabeth’s Pathfinder Crash Course

December 1, 2017

1m

Spencer teaches Elizabeth how to play Pathfinder.

79 Expanded Treasure Cart

December 1, 2017

1m

The gang tries to find cool treasure.

80 That’s a MONOLITH

December 1, 2017

1m

The gang tries to comprehend the true nature of the Keystone Obelisk.

81 Expanded Obelisk

December 1, 2017

1m

The gang tries to destroy the magical core of the Keystone Obelisk.

82 Fiddling While Rome Burns

December 1, 2017

1m

Fondue commits to a musical episode as the gang escapes from a crumbling ruin.

83 I Don’t Mean to Burst Your Bubble

December 1, 2017

3m

The gang gets trapped under the dome and tries in vain to get out.

84 A Non-Euclidean Room

December 1, 2017

4m

The gang encounters a highly mystical and non-euclidean room full of mirrors and magic that was meant to be animated but got cut for time.

85 Mirror, Mirror

December 1, 2017

1m

Beur wrestles with an alternate reality version of herself.

86 Expanded Sexuality

December 1, 2017

3m

Boneweevil realizes he’s bi.

87 Kumail’s Pathfinder Crash Course

December 1, 2017

2m

Kumail already knows how to play Pathfinder but it’s classic bonus content.

88 Eddie’s Robot

December 1, 2017

2m

Eddie Lizzard discusses his ascent to fame and fortune and shows off his robot.

89 Expanded Boss Fight

December 1, 2017

2m

The gang makes a few attacks and some quips.

90 Clunky Castle Combat

December 1, 2017

4m

The gang tries to do cool attacks for the animators, Beur attempts to land a final blow.

91 A Most Violent Voltron

December 1, 2017

2m

The gang tries to end the show with an ultimate attack, but luck is not on their side.

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