The first broadcast, in the form of a Comedy Playhouse pilot. The only way that Mike can take out a deposit on a new home is to take out a life insurance policy on Alf.

The Garnetts are at the pub when they encounter a group of celebrities whom, inevitably, Alf insults – Black actor/singer Kenny Lynch, Liverpool comedian Jimmy Tarbuck, and tough guy Australian actor Ray Barrett, described by Alf as 'the man with the holes in his face' due to his scarred complexion. The meeting isn't exactly the most cordial.

It's the summer of 1970 and voting day for the General Election. After casting his vote, Alf visits the pub and launches into a drunken tirade about Harold Wilson and the evils of Labour government.

It's Christmas Eve and Alf still has no present for Else. The Black man selling cheap watches seems like a lifesaver but maybe Alf should've held back on the slurs before buying. On Christmas Day, Alf propounds his view that Jesus was English, to dispute. However, a meeting in the pub with the cast of 'Jesus Christ Superstar' seems to support Alf's theory.

Else's sister Maud and her husband Ted have emigrated to Australia. However, Maud is unwell and Ted calls Else to help them out. Alf isn't keen to let her go but, for Else, the journey is two-fold – not only will she be helping her sister but she gets a much-deserved break from Alf.